MindspillLast Saturday afternoon, my mother called me & when I picked up the phone she was all out of breath asking if I was OK. I mean she was almost hysterical. After I told her I was fine, I asked her to calm down & tell me what was up with her.

She took a deep breath & told me that my brother has just called her & told her that I was dead. So I guess she called me immediately afterword.

Once I got over the shock of the comment, I was like WTF, why would he say that. She was like he just got out of the psych hospital (he’s in & out all the time). I was like, you need to send his ass back!!!

After we got off the phone, I felt disturbed by what my brother told momma. Then I started to think, maybe he had a vision because he “sees” shit all the time. I thought that maybe I should stay home & not proceed with my daily plans.

Eventually, I kinda got over & went out somewhat feeling that death was actively trying to get me.

I have not called my brother since because I do not feel like dealing with his psychosis. Baby told me that he has been having issues all week & my mother has been dealing with it. I just cannot go there & do have the mental power to handle it.

Schizophrenia is no joke & can really cause a lot of family stress. I hate when my brother goes through his mental battle when he strays from his meds.

I am not mad at him (this time), I’m just…
On another note: My uncle who’s in prison wrote me a letter 2 months ago & I have still not responded to it. While writing this, I looked at his picture, which is on my desk & I’m feeling guilty. I think next week, when I have a little more time on my hands, I will drop him a few lines. 

Writing prison notes is an energy drainer for me because I feel like I cannot say too about what is going right in my life because he’s behind bars. Hmmmm…..
On a final family note: I know I mentioned his birth already but I am still excited about the news. Last Thursday, my sister Baby gave birth to what I hope is her last child. If you have been following my chronicles, you know that she was expecting a boy. Well he was born @ 412am 7lbs 12.8oz 19″ & his name is Asar Nasir.

We are taking a trip to meet my nephew this coming Saturday & the girls are excited to see him.

Every time I’ve talked to Baby since she has been home, she sounds like she is about to pass out from exhaustion. I think my older nephew Bay Bay is giving her a run for her money.