Mindspill Last Saturday I celebrated my 9th wedding anniversary with my boo.  Usually we take a trip to celebrate our love out of town but this year it was not an option because my best friend Brion (BFB) got married on our special date (weird coincident).

Ever since BFB told me the wedding date I bitched at him about how he fucked up my vacation plan & that he owes me.  And he always basically said fuck you & you better be there (of course).

So anyway, the big day was last week & I was one of the groomsmen, which was interesting experience a) because I had not worn a tux since high school b) the wedding was large, which made me nervous even in my small role c) if I started to cry with joy everyone would see me.

Just before 515pm last Saturday, the pastor walked into the room with us guys to escort us out.  Before we walked out he asked that we all join hands for a prayer.

At this point, I was like ummmmmmm. & I just sat right were I was seated.  As the guys formed a prayer circle, everyone looked at me & was like come on.  I explained that I was not going to participate & another guy said what, I said I am an Atheist & I would not.  Then the same guy was like, you can’t make an exception for your boy, totally putting me on front street.

To take the drama out of the room & the spot light off of me, I stood up walked over, joined hands to complete the uncomfortable prayer circle.

After it was over, I got my mind right so that I could focus on standing in front of 300+ people during the exchange of vows between my friends.

Fast forward, it is now 1130pm & BFB, Suite Suzy & I were talking at the reception about me being pressured into praying.  Suite Suzy said I should have got off my ass and at least pretended.  BFB co-signed & said that I should have as well, then he said he just bowed his head & went along with the program despite his feelings. 

I also shared this story with my friend Zana days later & she sided with BFB & Suite Suzy & said when in Rome, do as the Romans or stay the fuck out.  She also looked at me & had that oh no you didn’t look, which was funny.

Basically BFB was not tripping on me & knew were I was coming from & he knows where my heart is.  I mean, we have been friends for 24 years, why would I do anything just to fuck him up???

Last Sunday on the drive home, I thought more about the church incident & was questioned why Christians (not all but many) like running guilt trips on others that do not see things the way they do.  And I also pondered, why fake a prayer in the circle of believers, wouldn’t my disbelief cancel some of that shit out???

Then I thought, what if I practiced Santeria and had that same guy at a religious gathering on my turf & we were about to sacrifice a chicken & I ran the same game on him that he ran on me.  Would he help in the murder of the said chicken to be there for his boy?  I think not.

This incident & a few others helped to solidify my belief that Christianity is a religion based on guilt, intolerance & mental domination.  If you want to argue me on this point, I can quote scripture that back my points up, so go there if you dare.  I grew up in the church so I am equipped to fight, although I prefer not to.

When I look at other regions, I do not see the as much of the things that turn me off about Christianity.  Ultimately, I respect all who respect my & my beliefs or lack there of.  I do not run around trying to convert people etc so don’t fuck with my by trying to force your practices, beliefs & systems on me.

Live & let live & do what’s best for you & I will do me.