I talked to my mom today & she was all up in arms about Jaunita Bynum getting her ass beat by her man recently. Of course I was with her on how fucked up the whole thing was/is but then she got all religious during the conversation & almost started “speaking in tounges” and shit.
At this point, I was ready to hang up because I was not about to listen to all that shit. So to throw my mom off I told her Jaunita’s man beat her ass because he caught her in lesbian affair & could not take it. Mom was like oh hell nall, WTF. Yeah she went from speaking in tounges to cussing all while smoking on the same cigarette. Mom later went on to tell me that Jaunita’s man admitted on some show somewhere that he was sexually molested by his uncle as a child & since then has been struggling with wanting hot dick & nuts while under the spell of Jaunita’s evangelistic holier than thou pussy power.
Well, I guess after Jaunita’s man goes to prison; the struggle over wanting hot dick & nuts will end as he will be in the land of plenty.
So tonight I was doing some ghetto research on Jaunita & found out that she already has a new man. You will not believe who she is fucking with now… Well according to TGNN (The Ghetto News Network), Jaunita is fucking with “The Spirit of Truth“.
I am not sure if you are up on “The Spirit of Truth” but this Nigga is out of his mutha fuckin’ mind. Check this:
I think “The Spirit of Truth” should hook up with my girl Alexyss Tylor & do a show. That shit would be so off the hook!!!
Anyway, I’m outta of the piece headed to Toronto for the long holiday weekend with the family so have a safe weekend yourself.
OK, wait, I am almost done talking shit but before I go I just wanna issue a fashion reminder. Remember not to wear white after Monday because if you do, I’m personally going to fuck you up. Fashion has not changed & white is not a year round color option (Icy White Air Force Ones are the one exception to this rule). Lastly, I wanna know who went out & got an outfit for Labor day to be sharp at the BBQ.